Posts Tagged ‘health’

7 TIBETAN STEPS TO LASTING JOY

There is something about the country of Tibet that has always intrigued me. Perhaps it’s the beautiful landscape along crystal blue waters or the unique architecture of its oriental style buildings. Or more importantly a group of monks that call this country their home are known for their serene way of life. They seem unaffected by the modern day stresses and anger that the rest of us are subjected to while residing primarily in a state of bliss. What is the secret to their joy? Researchers conducted a study of Tibetan monks and found that there are seven rituals that increase their levels of happiness an astonishing 700-800% over the average person.

1. Being Mindful: For many of us, the stressors of our daily lives are a lot to deal with. We’re often multitasking or thinking ahead as to what we need to take care of next. We are so consumed with the vast amount of tasks we are responsible to complete in the course of the day, as well as what faces us tomorrow and in our future, that we fail to be fully present to what is happening in the moment. The old cliché, “stop and smell the roses” is a great reminder of being mindful. Be aware of all that is around you and you will discover undiscovered beauty that can greatly enhance your day. Take time to gaze out of a window at the earth and sky around you; take notice of the color, texture, and aroma of the food you are eating; sit quietly as you watch with deep intent your child coloring a picture.

2. Oneness: Tibetan monks practice the belief of “oneness”, that we are all interconnected. The same energy that is me is also that which all others are comprised of. An activity called “compassion meditation” increases happiness and empathy by as much as 800%. Remembering that we all share the same basic needs, feelings, desires, and fears enables us to be less judgmental and more empathetic to the feelings and suffering of others. The desire to see others safe and happy and prosperous magnifies our own feelings of joy as well.

3. Laughing Out Loud: For 5,000 years, Tibetan monks have begun each day by laughing out loud upon awakening. It enables them to remain calmer and more focused. It is well documented that laughter has medicinal benefits by reducing the production of stress hormones while triggering the release of happiness-boosting endorphins. It also reduces tension in the blood vessels of the head, thus improving the flow of oxygen rich blood to the brain, keeping them alert. Faking a laugh can have the same benefits as laughter caused by a funny incident of joke. Recommended daily dose? A lot.

4. Sitting Up Straight: Good posture has multiple benefits. Consider this: all of the body’s nerves flow through the spine. Any interference can lead to reduction in brain function. Simply pulling one’s shoulders back can increase the electrical current to the brain. And the more efficiently the brain functions the less stress it endures. Less stress = greater happiness.

5. Gazing At One Object: I’ve always had the ability to “out-stare” anyone. I could affix my eyes on an object and stare at it without blinking for a long time. Tibetan monks meditate on a sole object. Studies show that doing so activates the frontal lobes of the brain, areas associated with superior concentration and faster reaction time. The greater our ability to concentrate the less effort we put forth in doing so. This enables us to feel more relaxed. And the beauty of this exercise is that it can be done anywhere for a short period of time to reap the benefits. Standing in line at the supermarket provides a perfect time for a mini one-point meditation.

6. Listening to Bells: The monks of Tibet begin and end prayer with the sound of small brass discs attached by string, called tingsha. Each disc is handmade so no two are identical. This causes each to vibrate at a slightly different frequency when struck. Studies show that when your brain hears two different frequencies it registers a frequency equal to the difference between the two. This sound refreshes both the body and the mind and is associated with both relaxation and heightened creativity.

7. Humming: Many cultures utilize chants or humming as a way to relax and focus. I recall listening to the Gregorian Chants sung by Catholic monks when I was a child. I always found them to be very soothing and comforting. But even the act of simply humming can increase your brainpower, boost endorphins, and lower your blood pressure and heart rate. Humming vibrates the hypothalamus and pituitary glands deep inside the brain, releasing feel-good hormones and disengaging the fight-or-flight response when one is stressed or fearful. Using a vowel sound such as ‘ah’ or ‘oh’ and lowering the sound to a place where you can feel the vibration throughout your entire body. I’ve used the sound “OM”. The mantra “OM” is the name of God, the very vibration of the Supreme Being. OM is the reflection of the absolute reality, without beginning or the end and embracing all that exists. It’s an excellent tool to reduce stress and induce joy and tranquility.

Monks, whether Tibetan, Catholic or any other faith, are globally recognized as authorities in tranquility and joy. Choose one or more of the above mentioned practices and incorporate it into your daily routine. Then take notice of how much happier and more relaxed you are. Here’s to your bliss.
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Anger: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

As a child I was taught that anger was a bad emotion but I’ve have since come to understand that there are no bad feelings. All emotions have purpose and value as they teach us about ourselves based on how we react to external events. We assign value to each depending on how people act them out. If someone feels angry and reacts by screaming or hitting someone, it is pretty well agreed upon that that’s bad. Hence the feeling behind the behavior is labeled likewise. Keep in mind that it’s imperative to always separate the feeling from the behavior. The emotion may be appropriate to the situation but the actions that follow may not be.

GOOD ANGER: Anger is a necessary part of our existence as it alerts us to the fact that something is wrong or in need of our attention. For example, if I’m constantly annoyed at my husband, my anger may signify that I have too many expectations of him and am not accommodating enough of our differences. Becoming more aware of my arrogance and consciously changing my thoughts about him enable me to move beyond anger to a place of loving acceptance. My anger ultimately proves to be a blessing as the peace I now acquire not only benefits me but my husband as well.

We may also experience anger when we witness an injustice is occurring. Without becoming upset or irate, how would we know that we need to take action to correct it? In this regard, laws have been created by man to protect the innocent and create a fair and equitable society for everyone.
And in the event we feel threatened or unsafe, whether physically, emotionally, sexually, verbally, etc, anger prepares us for the vital fight or flight response. We either stay to correct a wrongdoing or we flee in order to keep ourselves safe.

BAD ANGER: Anger becomes problematic when it is mishandled, misdirected (at those who are undeserving) or the result of a misconception.
A popular song, Lost Boy, is one of my new top five favorites. I recently listened to it on Youtube and much to my surprise discovered that it’s performed by a lovely dark skinned young woman. I had envisioned a 14 year old Caucasian girl with a short pixie haircut. I mentioned to a friend of mine how surprised I was. “She didn’t sound black”, I stated. “What’s that supposed to mean?” she asked, clearly disturbed by my comment. “Just how are blacks supposed to sound?” She was clearly irate. “Some black singers have a very distinct kind of twang (for lack of a better descriptive term) to their voice”, I responded, “much like a Southerner might or an Aussie from down under, a Hispanic sporting a Spanish accent, and so on. Each has a unique sound to their voice that gives insight into their heritage or where they’re from.”

In this instance, my friend clearly had unresolved issues with racism, insecurity, poor self-image or some such issue. Her reaction indicated that she was not comfortable with my comment and perceived it to be derogatory. Such a perception led her to respond with anger. When one takes personal offense to what others are saying or doing or misinterprets anothers innocent actions as hostile, their anger reveals a deeper rooted issue that is causing distress to themselves. However, with serious introspection, one can determine the root cause of their indignation and thus seek an effective solution through understanding and healing.

Anger can be detrimental to our physical health as explosive or long-term anger can cause the body’s natural immune system to break down making one more susceptible to a range of diseases from high blood pressure to ulcers, cancer and more. There are also times when we use anger against ourselves, when we are so upset we may deny ourselves the chance to be happy or to take advantage of a wonderful new opportunity; to laugh or find joy in the moment or to fully express or receive love. Anger can damage our outlook on life, impede our emotional well-being, and rob us of our overall sense of enjoyment in life.

UGLY ANGER: Anger at its worst becomes ugly when it is used to hurt or offend others or cause any type of damage to a person or object. Criticism, belittling, embarrassing, ignoring, and gossiping are all expressions of anger at its worst. Acts of racism, physical violence, hate speech, betrayals are all violent forms of anger being expressed with the sole purpose of causing extreme pain or hardship to another. Intimidation, manipulation, threats and coercion all seek to gain control over another party through the use of force. Damage to nature or personal property through acts of rioting and looting or individual acts of rage are all reminders of just how ugly anger can become when it’s intent is to harm rather than to foster positive change.

To summarize: anger is neither a bad emotion nor a good one. It’s simply a messenger. When we are able to understand why we react in anger as opposed to another feeling, we can uncover the root cause of our issues, resolve them and ultimately channel our actions into creating positive change that benefits not only the self but those around us as well. Use anger to your advantage. Much good can come from doing so.
Order The Secret Side of Anger, Second Edition or The Great Truth @ http://www.pfeifferpowerseminars.com/pps1-products.html

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THIS HIDDEN SECRET WILL TRANSFORM YOUR RELATIONSHIP

With the exception of impersonators, most people believe that they only have one voice. That voice is used to express one’s feelings and needs. It can be vocalized either loudly or softly; it’s tone can change from one of sarcasm to that of compassion; one’s voice can be used to express happiness, anger, sadness, silliness, compliments or criticisms. We have our “baby” voice, (typically reserved for newborns), our disciplinary voice (used for our children), our boisterous voice (most commonly found at ballgames, amusement parks or hurled at obnoxious drivers), and our multi-purpose whisper. Words are powerful energies that can encourage, degrade, incite fear, convey love, and so much more. What few people realize is that we have not a single voice but actually two: we have our inner voice – our thoughts – which may then be expressed verbally in our outer voice. Let’s examine the role of both and how they impact our relationships.

In Chapter 4 of my book, The Secret Side of Anger, I speak about a formula that drives the course of our life which I refer to as T~E~C~O Magic: Thoughts, Emotions, Choice, Outcome. The most powerful tool we have are our thoughts, our internal voice that speaks to us throughout the course of every day. From forming opinions about the weather, to determining what items of clothing we’ll wear, to what we think about our children, spouse, friends, coworkers, and even strangers, what we say to ourselves impacts how we feel and ultimately how we treat others in our life.

Consider this: People often believe that when they meet the right person they magically fall in love with them. In most circumstances, at some point the magic fades and they fall out of love. This is a common misconception. What actually takes place is that initially our internal voice repeatedly reminds us of the wonderful attributes the other person possesses. “She’s beautiful!” “He’s so smart!” “I love the way he’s so laid back and easy going.” Our internal voice reminds us of everything wonderful about our significant other. Thoughts, the words and opinions we form in our mind, create Emotions. All feelings are generated by our internal voice. And it’s the feelings that we eventually act out in the subsequent Choices we make – how we choose to speak to and/or treat our partner. We may share compliments or express our gratitude at having such a wonderful person to share our life with. In this case, the Outcome, or result, is a relationship that flourishes.

However, at some point our thoughts typically begin to change. The positive, loving reminders are exchanged for harsh criticism. “She’s beautiful” is replaced with “She conceited.” The quality once referred to as “smart” now is defined as “arrogant”. “Laid back and easy going” is relabeled “lazy and a wimp.” Regardless of the individual’s character or actually behaviors, it is our internal voice, how we label them, that ultimately determines how we feel about them. Feelings change over the course of any relationship not necessarily based on the changes that occur within each party but rather how each person chooses to see their partner. People will choose to see what they want to see and feel what they want to feel about one another. The truth about who that person actually is has little, if anything, to do with it.

How we feel about our partner dictates how we treat them. Those who are treated well remain in relationships and work together to foster a healthy, satisfying, lifetime partnership. Those who allow their inner voice to poison their emotions will ultimately sabotage any love and commitment the two originally shared. One can secure the well-being of their marriage, or any other significant relationship, by utilizing this one secret weapon: monitor and carefully choose your internal voice for it determines how you feel and treat your spouse and ultimately directs the course of your relationship.

Thought ~ Emotion ~ Choice ~ Outcome: TECO Magic: it really works. I should know: this is what’s kept my 20-year marriage alive and happy.

Order The Secret Side of Anger, Second Edition or The Great Truth @ http://www.pfeifferpowerseminars.com/pps1-products.html

Listen to past shows on iHeart Radio @ http://ow.ly/OADTf
Listen to my newest iHeart Radio show, BETWEEN YOU AND GOD, @ http://ow.ly/OADJK
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