First it was Dan “Buck” Brannaman, the horse whisperer; then Cesar Millan who whispered to dogs. A Google search revealed there are whisperers for cats, babies, donkeys, skunks, reptiles and (no joke) one for serial killers. In this week’s edition of the Daily Record, a unique category emerged when a gentleman named Jim Conroy referred to himself as the “tree whisperer.” He believes that trees and plants respond to touch, bioenergy and alternative forms of healing. While those of the animal kingdom use their special abilities to train difficult members of their designated species, Mr. Conroy uses his gift to heal and balance plant life, specifically trees. The serial killer whisperer, well, you can Google that one yourself.
Never being one who kept up with current trends (a quick glance at my wardrobe will attest to that), I’ve decided to jump on the bandwagon of this one. Henceforth, from this moment on, I want to be identified as the “Anger Whisperer”. Cool moniker, isn’t it? I hereby claim exclusive rights to it (if that’s even possible).
What does it mean to be an Anger Whisperer? Too often, when people become upset with another individual or in a particular situation, they become aggressive and loud. Yelling, screaming, cursing or threatening becomes a method of expressing their discontent. Many believe that situations (“I can’t get the stupid lid off this jar!”) respond best to loud noises. We can all attest to the fact that lids react favorably to an increase in vocal volume. And certainly, we’ve all witnessed the positive impact on others when we scream at them. I know I have. I suddenly develop a fervent desire to comply with the other party when they raise their voice at me.
An “anger whisperer” is one who chooses to speak with confidence rather than hysteria. (The above behaviors are hysterical – and not in the comedic sense.) Secure in their position, they speak clearly and concisely, make requests rather than demands, avoid blame like the plague, are respectful of all parties, and actively seek solutions. Being an “AW” conserves energy, too. It takes far less exertion to speak calmly as opposed to harshly. Additionally, you avoid alienating or offending those around you or damaging the task you are working on. And no one needs to “clean up your mess” when your rant is complete.
I invite each one of you to become an “anger whisperer” disciple. When confronting another person:
~ Speak your words softly but firmly (as my above “whispering” colleagues do);
~ Build trust;
~ Gain the cooperation and respect of those around you;
~ Work towards finding a solution that benefits all concerned;
~ Be a voice of peace and healing;
Whispering works. Try it. Just don’t steal my handle. : >)
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